Hiyaa (Part 4) - Blog post (English)


So the reason why I decided to address this controversial topic of ‘prince charming’ is very simple. Many of us belong to a generation that grew up watching fairy tales. And many of us sisters, if not all of us, grew up with the notion that a handsome man on a white horse is going to rescue us and make us princesses and then live happily ever after.
As we grow older, reality hits us and we realize that life is not a fairy tale. We realize that there aint no castles, white horses or men wearing capes. So we grow out of this idea of having a ‘prince charming’. And it is in this process that many of us end up falling into a trap. The trap of ‘compromising’ our standards. And what we decide to ‘compromise’ in that regard, will impact the rest of our lives. Here is what some of us end up saying as we do so:
“Well he comes from a rich family. So I mustn’t mind if he uses foul language every once in a while. Because no one is perfect.”
“So what if he is being so close and friendly with the other girls? He gives me attention and shows me love as much as I like to. I mustn’t mind as no one is an angel to be that good.”
“What if he lies every once in a while? He is charismatic and drives a nice car. I wouldn’t ever get someone like him if I leave him!”
In the name of compromising our standards, with the realization that we can’t have the perfect life we dreamed of, a lot of us compromise standards we never should. And then we end up making decisions in life that we regret. We end up attracting people into our lives who hurt us to the point that’s hard to even recover.
So does a prince charming actually exist? If I was asked this question a few months ago, I would have said no. But within the past few months, as I reflected on the character of the ‘prince charming’ that we see in movies, I realized something. I realized that that character isn’t charming because of his wealth or looks. Because quite frankly there are entire story lines where the prince charming is in disguise as a normal person. What actually makes him ‘charming’ is his charming character. I will repeat that. What makes him charming, is his charming CHARACTER!
And the more I thought about that character, the more I realized how in line it is, with the sunnah of the Prophet (SAW). And how similar it is to the concept of Qawwam in the Quran. (Well I would say that these concepts are actually better than what they depict in the movies.)
So dear sisters, while we do realize that no one can be perfect, never, NEVER compromise the standard of character that you are looking for as you search for someone to spend the rest of your life with. And when we do raise our standards, the people around us will realize our worth. And they will raise themselves to those high standards that we were taught by Allah and His Messenger (SAW) when we do so.
PS: I have decided to describe the characteristics of a 'Qawwam' (concept of a man in the Quran) in my current story like i haven't done before. So that we are all clear on what to expect from a man In Sha Allah 


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Salaam dear readers. You can read my new dhivehi story 'Hiyaa' on oneonline.mv. :)



Comments

  1. Thank you. Jana . I wish u a happy life. U are such a good person. From this blog we really get a lot of information that how we need to improve our life. How to follow sunnah. Inshaallah today onwards I will include you in my dua to improve your knowledge and to give you a happy life.

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    1. Subhaanallah i'm so touched. :') Alhamdhulillah its only Allah Who guides and it is only He Who will keep us on the right path when we keep trying. Will remember you in my duas as well Unknown. May Allah bless you immensely both in this world and in the next. Ameen!

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